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How do I recognise domestic abuse?

Does your partner:

• Push/shove, hit, punch, slap, kick or bite you or the children?

• Threaten to harm you, the children or your relatives?

• Threaten to or use a weapon against you?

• Threaten to kill you if you leave?

• Force you to have sex against your will?

• Anger easily when drinking or taking drugs?

• Humiliate you in front of others?

• Deliberately / maliciously destroy personal property or other items of sentimental value to you?

• Constantly accuse you of being unfaithful?

• Constantly and obsessively ‘track’ your time and whereabouts?

• Constantly criticise you or put you down?

• Prevent you from working, leaving your home or socialising?

• Discourage your relationships with family and friends?

• Control all finances and force you to account in detail for what you spend?

• Deny you access to money even for household necessities?

Bystander action

If someone you know is experiencing domestic abuse:

• Express concern

• Assure them that the violence is not their fault

• Support, but don’t advise

• Give resources

• Only intervene if it is legal and safe for you to do so


If you are aware of abuse between strangers, evaluate the best way of intervening:

• Distract

• Delegate

• Direct